Corrupt a Wish V.4

Granted. You are so good at every instrument, that you can't ever decide which one to play which in turn leads you to not playing due to indecisiveness which in turn ultimately leads you to sucking at music because you never play.

I wish I had clarity of thought

Granted. You decide once and for all to get a lobotomy.

I wish Wales was independent.

Granted, the prince has to give his wife to me!!

I wish I could make up my mind to stay single.
(DW, I sometimes envy you)

Well, you could always turn yourself into a eunuch so there would be no urges for you. Plus, you could sing in castrato!

I wish I had a Blackberry.

Granted: you want it fresh off the vine or from the freezer. At least it tastes good.

I wish that I could create the ultimate computer that would live alongside humans in peace and harmony. (Meaning NO COMPUTER TURNING AGAINST HUMANITY, FIND SOMETHING ELSE!)

It creates things that turn against humanity. So yeah, turning against humanity does happen, sorry.

I wish there were no disease.

Granted. Parasitic infections run amok over everyone though.

I wish for a new table.

Granted.

It is of the actuarial persuasion and fills you with angsty angst.

I wish for a reconquista involving light dinner fare.

Centipedes. Deep fried and coated with barbecue sauce. Served with a Toasted Almond, while fancy music is played in the background.

I wish for vodka in college. Lots and lots of vodka.

Granted, you die from alcohol poisoning.

I wish to be awesome

You despair at how awesome you are and how bad everyone else is, and so you kill yourself to balance everything out. There can be only one! (me. Highlander reference)

I wish I were good at drums.

Granted. You are awesome. A group of shadowy business interests grinds you up and makes you into a sauce to be sprinkled liberally over life.

I wish for an mocktopus.

Not granted, I'm not a fucking Genie and I never will be!

I wish I were a Genie.

Granted, you can only grant wishes to ants now and ants don't wish. Seeing as your life essence is based on giving wishes, you succumb to depression.

I wish pencil sharpeners worked

Granted. They only work on sharpening heads. You now attempt to try sharpening your head, but instead you cut to your brain and you die.

I wish grass doesn't grow.

Granted, welcome to the Nevada dessert.

I wish I could find good rotoscopes of James T Kirk

Granted. But there crap, due the fact no one ever made any.

I wish people would stop corrupting wishes, when I'm posting my Corruptions

Bit of an oxymoron don't you think? I find good ones, but they're crap? How can they be good if they're crap?

Granted, life suddenly becomes happy and joyful due to everyone not corrupting wishes any longer.

I wish I could speel (spell) ?

Ganretd, but olny if you can raed the fsrit and lsat wdors in tihs steencne.
(I'm actually wondering who can and can't it was something my 7th grade teacher did, only with a paragraph....)

I wish I had a kitty.

Granted, it's a Siberian tiger kitten corpse.

I wish to wish for wishing wishes.

(I understood your whole sentence by the way Scar.)

Galaxy-Scarface wrote:Ganretd, but olny if you can raed the fsrit and lsat wdors in tihs steencne.
(I'm actually wondering who can and can't it was something my 7th grade teacher did, only with a paragraph....)

I wish I had a kitty.

You Spelt some of it right ?